Having a job as a life coach, one might conjure up images of an over achieving perfectionist, someone always working hard to set and achieve goals, this would not be far from the truth! lol. While this may be true (my family suffering the brunt of these personality traits), things do not always turn out as I plan. As any good perfectionist would do, when I had my children I set very high expectations for myself as a mother. I have now developed my humorous “Top Ten List” to include those moments as a mother when my humanity was most evident. I consider myself a recovering perfectionist these days! Here are some of the items from my list.
First big event occurred when my daughter was four. I had noticed when we were looking at books, she suddenly asked to see the book and would move it to within two inches from her eyes. Clue-she probably needs to see an eye doctor. After making an appointment and sitting through the exam, the eye doctor looks at me and says, “Now Mrs. Meyer, please don’t feel guilty, but Alyssa has probably been seeing out of one eye her entire life”. Who knew? She could color in the lines and cut with a scissors, all the skills necessary for pre-school! This then resulted in hours each day for two years of patching her eye. Don’t feel guilty? Yeah, right.
Second on my list is a doozy! When my daughter played softball. I had arranged my work schedule so I could be at all her games and sat with my husband two nights/week through the tedium of watching 7 year olds attempt to catch or hit the ball, pick grass and zone out in the 95 degree weather. So one particular evening, the game ends and the kids gather around with their hair slicked down to their heads from sweat, flushed red faces, eagerly awaiting their post-game refreshment and snack. Everyone keeps looking around and I hear someone say, “Who was bringing in the snack tonight”? All of a sudden I froze and my stomach dropped- it was my turn to bring the snack and I had completely forgotten. I had to do a very enthusiastic apology in an attempt to convey my sincere regret, as they all walked off limp from the heat not caring about my explanation. Tal about guilt, I not only let my child down but her whole team and their parents.
Finally, item number three on my list. My daughter is in the 5th grade and I got home from work around 5:00 and asked her how her day was. She informed me that it had been school picture day and I had forgotten to send her envelope with the money so she could not order any school pictures. Not only had I forgotten to send it, it was buried in a pile on my desk and I had never even filled it out. So she will have one school year with no pictures! Guilt? I am an avid scrap booker and will now be missing that adorable 5th grade school picture, my shame to be forever documented in her scrapbook. Lessons learned? It does not matter how much you love your children or how well-intentioned one is, we are all human and there is no such thing as the perfect parent, person or even coach! All we can do is try better the next time, keep our expectations realistic and keep a sense of humor! Rock on mommas!